One week ago today I found myself sick with worry in the
hospital room. I had spoken to many doctors and they all seemed to have their
own theories. Through it all, one doctor seemed to be the most sure of the
prognosis – Dr. John Feerick. This man is my hero.
He looked at my baby and he looked at me with unwavering
eyes, “Your baby has a milk allergy.” This did not come as a surprise. I had
suspected it once I found bright red blood in his icky, green stool. I was a
breastfeeding mother and after some research I found I needed to take out every
speck of milk from my diet. Two weeks later baby Patrick had shown some
improvement but began to take a turn for the worse when the vomiting started.
Dr. Feerick explained that it would be best to give my son
only an amino acid based formula and to discontinue breastfeeding. My heart was
broken. I had such strong convictions against formula feeding and I wanted
nothing to do with it. But, I couldn’t deny the fact that breastfeeding was
literally killing my son. I gave in and accepted the fact that there would be
no more breastfeeding for me.
The next day I noticed my baby began crying and was
increasingly fussy. Great. The hospital prescribed Maalox. Patrick was taking
it after every feeding. This wasn’t working either. Giving him that much
medicine, even though it was every two hours, couldn’t be good for such a
little body. Dr. Feerick came in again and I began to ask serious questions
about the possibility of breastfeeding if I only consumed the amino acid
formula.
One might question how I even considered such an option.
There were rules I had made for myself as a mother and one of them was: I would
never feed my child something I myself would not eat. So if I was planning on feeding
my son formula, the only thing he could ingest without having a reaction, why
couldn’t I eat it too thus making my breast milk good for him again? Dr.
Feerick was open to the option and said he did know of one other mother who had
done it and found success. He also mentioned it might help my ulcerative
colitis.
On that remark I was sold. I would use my body as a
processing plant; by consuming that which my baby could tolerate, I would
produce breast milk he could eat without getting sick, and Patrick wouldn’t
have to take iron supplements or the Maalox. I could see no downside to my new
diet. Course, that was until I began to tell the rest of the medical staff of
my intentions.
The dieticians were the most concerned and I honestly feared
they were considering contacting Child Protective Services. Thankfully, after
research they relented and said they could find nothing wrong with my diet, and
cautiously gave their okay. I almost cried with relief.
Dr. Feerick was on board with my diet and sent me home with
some samples. I have Neocate and Elecare. I will need to consume one can per
day to meet my necessary daily caloric intake. Each can provides me with 1900
calories. I personally need 1400 calories and the remainder 500 calories will
support my ability to breastfeed my baby.
The first time I tried Elecare I thought it tasted pretty
terrible. I think most of it was because I told myself it would. After I
chugged it, it didn’t taste so bad but my stomach wasn’t too happy. I think it
was asking, “What the heck was that?” After two days I could tell I had flushed
out my system. I wondered if I was ready to try breastfeeding. The concern is: will my baby still want to
breastfeed after being on the bottle for over a week?
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